3 Decades Old

Today is the day... I'm 30.  YIKES!  I've been laughing all day because as people wish me happy birthday it almost sounds like they are offering their condolences. I really don't feel like I have much to say right now about turning 30.  I'm sure that will change at some point but for now I'll just tell you about the birthday party I had last weekend. 

Yes, again this year I threw myself a birthday party.  Maybe it's an odd thing to do but it's my excuse to have a themed party, get my guests to dress up, and create a fun atmosphere that gets remembered (for a while anyway).  This year a Murder Mystery party was on the agenda.  And as previously blogged it was going to be a wild west theme.

So I went ahead and downloaded the game which came with all the clues, invitations, a website guest could log into to find out more details and other party tips and ideas.  Of course, being me I had to design my own invitations, clues, name tags etc.
Here are my creations:

Everyone did such a great job staying in character and trying to figure out the clues that led to the murderer, it was so much fun.  So here are a few more pictures from the evening.

The Cast!

5 Lessons from Gone with the Wind

Apparently I didn't get enough book reports out of my system in high school—that almost seems impossible. Nevertheless, these are lessons I learned in reading Gone with the Wind.  I'm not saying they are lessons I have exceeded in accomplishing - these in many cases have been truly convicting.  I have had this nagging feeling, since starting Gone with the Wind, of heart ache.  I'm not sure if my hopes for the "greatest love story ever told" (I naively assumed a feel good) were being dashed by what I think is more accurately "a great love story tragedy" or if I really just became invested in the characters but either way I *felt* this book.

When I first started contemplating this post it was out of a pang in my gutt and I thought I must get my thoughts out there somehow... but I had no idea what it would turn into.  As I am writing and revising and coming to terms with my thoughts I am realizing this is a SUPER DUPER "keeping it real" post.  So I have come back up to the top here to write this little disclaimer that I share my heart and it ain't always pretty so if you are looking for a light-hearted post on GWTW this isn't the one to read...google on my friends there are some good ones out there but this one is personal and apparently I feel the need to share ;)

Here's the short side of it.  I put up walls and I put them up fast.  If I think I'm going to be hurt I get angry and pissy and stay-the-heck-away-from-me-y because I want whomever I fear is going to hurt me to get back, run in fear, leave me alone... better than being hurt and vulnerable!  right?!?  ummm no, not right but I do it time and again unless I can consciously stop myself.
And that my dears is exactly what I feel like Scarlet does.  I guess her wall is money and a do-what-I-want attitude. BUT they are walls baby!

So, without further ado, here are a few things
I have been pondering as my heart aches through this book: 

Benji's Birthday! Today my nephew was born.

One thing I plan on doing to relax this weekend is probably not going to do much relaxing this weekend so I scratched that... but I am going to be celebrating my birthday a little early with some friends and one infamous Murder Mystery Dinner... stay tuned pics, a recap and hopefully a little video will be posted for the curious.

A big pet peeve of mine is driver's ignoring all traffic/construction signs waiting until the last minute to merge....NOT OKAY!

I am really loving fall! Here is a pic of my mantel fall decor!

Yesterday was 10-11-12... Just sayin'.

My favorite flower is I don't have a favorite flower I don't think.  Any flowers given to me I love including potted.  Succulents I think are beautiful, I really like babies breath cause it looks the same alive and dried.  Oh I do have a least favorite flower.   Oriental Lily.  Yeah they are pretty but the pollen is messy and I think the smell of the flowers is terrible.

Most recent favorite flowers...Phil had them delivered to work.  Sigh. Swoon!

Foto Fun-day!

I felt like it was time to catch you up in my life via a few photos so here you go!

HI!  My hair has gotten really long.

I got some cute new shoes for fall!

I finally went the Dirty Guv'nahs concert!!!

It's Birthday month!!!

Welcome to October.  Funny thing is ... wait what's the funny thing?  Oh I don't know.  I don't even really like celebrating my birthday once it gets here but I love talking about it and planning an event.  I think birthdays should be a day you get to plan something super fun to do but it isn't about you it's just your day.  I think that doesn't really make sense.  Well that doesn't surprise me; my head is everywhere recently.

Did I mention this birthday will officially make me 30!!!  Yeah for real 30!  Ummm I want to be okay with that and I know everyone will tell me reasons why I should be but today I'm feeling....overwhelmed by it.  Kind of like what have these 30 years accomplished? Have I done anything that matters?  Have I brought glory to God at all?  Man it's easy for insecurity to creep in on me in October.  It's a weak month for me for sure.  Also, giving up life hopes (little "h") and expectations are not easy even when your head knows truth the heart can be slow to catch up.

So that was a super happy way to start the week.

Anyway, I just recently finished listening to Gone with the Wind (49 hours) of audio listening... and I loved it!

Not that everyone has time to listen to/read such a long book but it is totally worth it if you have never read it.  Now I am reading the sequel to GWTW, it's called Scarlett.... did you even know such a thing existed well I somehow grew up not knowing this and just for the record Scarlett should be considered mandatory reading along with GWTW.  I sort of feel like I have learned some life lessons from Scarlett O'Hara through this literary adventure.  I'm going to work on putting my thoughts on this together and I'll get back to you (here is the follow up post) cause I'm not quite there yet.