Friday, December 9, 2011

All Lovey-Dovey...

It's Friday and I am pumped about that!
The questions for today center around love because the gal who I follow to get these question is celebrating her 4 year anniversary with her husband... sooooo they all sort of center around that.  I think I'll take a little bit of a different approach in answering so they may seem a bit random but they should be still little tid-bits into getting to know me better....soooo I hope you enjoy.  this is a long one... hope you are bored or have endurance... I think it will be worth it.

Love is  an all encompassing word in the English language that we use for people we most care about to the food we eat most often. The Hebrew and Greek languages (that we see Biblically) have more than one word for different types or aspects of love.  So I'll break it down for interest sake.


1. Hebrew word ahab - spontaneous, impulsive love 
2. Hebrew word hesed - deliberate choice of affection and kindness
3. Hebrew word raham - to have compassion, brotherly love
4. Hebrew word ahava -  giving love. Love that gives, unselfish love; "most commonly used term for both interpersonal love and love between God and God's creations."

Spells Ahava

1. Greek word eros - Eros was Greek god of love - sensual, sexual, impulsive (we get English word "erotic")

 Interesting fact: Plato defined this love as aspiring for and delighting in the value of its object; loving that which is lovable

2. Greek word philia - Greeks used as love for friend, spouse, children (we get English words philosophy, philanthropy, philology, bibliophile, Philadelphia, Philip, etc.)

3. Greek word agape - Greek OT used over 300 times to refer to God's selective and exclusive love for Israelite people and Predominant word for love in new covenant (over 250 occurrences in NT). Invested with new meaning
4. Greek word storge - child-to-parent love
Interesting fact: eros and storge are never used in the New Testament.

My favorite quote about love is I got to go with an oldie but goody, 1 Corinthians 13.
I mean seriously, just read it - don't just skim it... I know you were going to!

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.  (my own emphasis added)

The most important thing in a relationship is selflessness. If you are working your hardest to honor the other I think relationships come much easier.

A "deal breaker" for me in a relationship is if this relationship we are referring to is marriage then my answer is Death. I have made a covenant until death do us part and I mean it, scary as that sounds.  You can pull out all the cards of "what ifs" but divorce just isn't for me.  I'm not saying I wouldn't seperate if needed for safety or recovery or something but the deal isn't off - love, honor and respect.  I'm all in.

The way I show love in my relationships is service by default but I really try to speak that certain persons love language. So for example I know that one of Phil's main love language is gifts, so I try to make or buy little somethings to encourage or show him I love him.
Here I go again... have you ever read The 5 Love Languages?  Well you should!  It is a GREAT book that really put a lot of insight into how I love others and how I receive love.  Specifically it helped me understand my Mom a whole lot better in college when I was really struggling to know how to show her I truly love her.
So if you like instant gratification and you don't want to read the book right now but are kind of curious... you can take this quiz

I love {in English} :-)  God, Phil, my family (specifically Mark, Eileen, Scott, Leah, Anne, Boone Chapman), Buster and Arden my pups, my friends!, curling up under a blanket with a good book, wind, sunrises and sunsets, seeing something I designed/photographed printed, crafts, hosting people at my house, candles

so that's it!  You made it!  or maybe you didn't either way hope you maybe learned something or just enjoyed yourself.  Happy Friday.

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